The Menopausal Goddess and Mid Life Crisis

The time comes when you just embrace
your inner goddess!

This is a repost of the 2013 April A-Z Blogging Challenge.  I have chosen to talk about the Menopause Goddess and Mid Life Crisis.

I have reached that time in life and rather than sink into a bed of midlife depression, I have decided to just unleash and embrace my inner menopausal goddess.

Now of course if I had lots of money I could do it in celebrity style with lots of Botox and a permanent smile, but I like to sleep with my eyes closed, ya know!

Since I can't change the whole aging thing, I am just gonna learn to embrace the menopausal goddess inside of me. I appreciate the stars like Lisa Rinna because I can now be confident that adult diapers won't show through my clothes.

Doctors say that Kegels are as important to older women as the Heimlich and become as routine as cleaning the house or doing the dishes. Remember to keep up with those Kegel's ladies!

Most of us go from flat to round in many areas like the tummy and the butt. Everyone is different. It was around age 48 that I noticed that my dryer started shrinking all of my jeans. Since I re-injured my knee I am not really as active as I used to be. I still take walks, but exercises like aerobics and Zumba make my knee scream at me. I was told that I just needed some Yoga and Meditation.

Maybe it's just me, but it's almost like if you were wishing for a poo and all you can do is fart- ya know- one of those kinds of things!

I do wish I had paid more attention in school though because Sigmund Freud's law of gravity also applies to our breasts. I am learning that we can't defeat gravity as we watch our breasts transform from perky to sagging almost instantly, overnight. Ladies of all ages remember support is very important!  My mama was born in the 1940's, back when the ladies didn't wear bras when they were pregnant for fear a bra would restrict their milk coming in. So, when I was pregnant with my first child I thought my mama knew best. Oh no! She was so wrong. I am at an age where that ghost of many Christmases past came back to haunt me. I wish someone had told me differently! Ladies... keep those bras on I say!

We ladies love jewelry. Enjoy all your fancy pieces while you can. Treasure those days because the day will come when your favorite necklace will be replaced by a life alert necklace.

Embrace your inner goddess ladies otherwise you could easily become one of the ladies packing your bags and moving to Cougartown. When that doesn't work, they go on talk shows crying to Dr. Phil while the rest of us scream at the TV who knew that wouldn't happen! I say Look in the Mirror. Which is more beautiful? Your Inner Menopause Goddess or Batshit Crazy?

Now we all know that men too can also go through a period in their lives that is called a midlife crisis. I'm wondering, just who the heck decided to call it a crisis?

Why is it just a menopausal thing or The Change when it is referring to us ladies and it's a crisis when it involves the guys?

The word crises sound so traumatic, doesn't it? To me, a crisis is, for instance, the house is on fire. A crisis is when a bungee cord breaks, or you've fallen and you can't get up- stuff like that. I have never heard of the police having a mid-life crisis team in place. Why are we ladies expected to set back and suck it up, but let a guy see a gray or a wrinkle and suddenly... It becomes a crisis? Since males are supposed to be the stronger species they need to.... stop being such a drama king! 

©Gossip_Grl 

Inside The Menopausal Mind

This is a Maxine pic

This is a repost of the post for an older April A-Z posting I did for the letter I.  I have chosen Inside the Menopausal Mind as my topic today. I noticed about the same time that my AARP card arrived in the mail that many changes take place inside our minds during menopause.

Yep folks! I am an official card carrying member of the AARP and somehow I feel as if I am stuck in the middle. You see, I am too young for all the senior benefits and retirement; yet old enough to know better. It sucks.

In years past I used to shop for purses and shoes; I now shop for Gold Bond Anti Itch cream. I used to love going shopping, now just the thought of it makes me want to take a nap.
Driving is the worst. I used to not care so much how people drove on the roadway, now it's crazy. Those cars that pass on the shoulder thinking they

A Trip Down Hormone Lane

Reposted from the 2013 April A-Z Blogging Challenge for the letter H and I've decided to take A Trip Down Hormone Lane. Along for the ride my new menopausal friends. Itchy Dry Skin, Hot

flashes, Bloated, Slow Metabolism, Sleepless Nights, Crazy Dreams, I Need A Nap and I can't forget Moody Patooty plus two Bitchy and Psycho.

Oh, they are all a lot of laughs to have around me, daily. It's hours of fun here at my house I tell you. I am actually thinking about claiming all of them on my taxes next year. If I am going to be supporting them and they don't have jobs I should be able to claim them right?

The trip on Hormone Lane is like a Pandora's Box as we travel to our first stop on the trip. It is The Follicle Stimulating Hormone Test. This is the test that

The Geritol Years

Today's post is about The Geritol Years. Geritol- remember that commercial?

My parents take Geritol and for some odd reason, I always thought because I was raised on the Lawrence Welk Show in our home, that it was somehow the vitamin of choice in the golden years; a given rite of passage. That was until my doctor put me on daily Prenatal Vitamins for these menopause years. Long story

The Midlife Crisis Checklist

pic was sent to my Facebook

The Change

Do you ever remember the women in your family talking in code? If not, then it must have been something that the ladies only did in my family. I can remember as a child the adult women discussing something of an adult nature. Should you invade that privacy they would say, "little pitchers have big ears." That was the code word for kids to get the heck out of the room.

Once or more I walked in and heard my mom and aunt talking adult using the code word, The Change. If I lingered too long in the room and of course, little pitchers have big ears. In my childhood, I had no idea what it meant when the women were discussing these code words about the change and often whispered words to each other. The women of my mothers' generation were a confusing bunch of ladies.

I don't think my mom ever gave me the talk. She says she did but if the conversation I remember was the talk she is referring to then she was confused. It was in the 1970s. My mom was born in the 1940s and grew up in a different generation than that of the '60s and '70s. Her talk proved that there was a huge generation gap. If every teen girl in my generation got that same talk it is no wonder we got confused along the way.

Now that I am older I understand when adults are talking about something of an adult nature that shouldn't be discussed in front of children, but what about when those children grow up?

Here I am all of these years later, menopausal and going through The Change that so many years ago was discussed in secrecy when I was the little pitcher with the big ears. What in the heck was so bad that it was whispered about?

My mom was in her 70's when I needed some history about the women in her family for the doctor. One of the questions asked at what age did the women in my family experienced menopause? 

I ask her, I get a look like someone just farted, and then she slaps my arm! 

What? No talk? No whispers about The Change? 

Nope, just a slap, and she said, "we didn't talk about stuff like that." 

Hmmm... really because I remember it way different!

I have a daughter and should she ask me I would be honest and open with her. She knows that I am going through menopause because I couldn't hide any of this, especially the mood swings!

© 2014 Gossip_GrL

Menopause For Dummies

I went browsing the ole Google search tip line for books on Menopause with tips on how to manage this stage of life unsure of just what keywords would work best and I stumbled across a book called Menopause for Dummies.

Wait do we really need a book with a title like that? 

There is so much in life that can be planned. Menopause has no set guidelines. no set of plans or even rules. Now, it would have been so much easier if I was born with the guidebook to the menopausal years, but I wasn't.

This part of life just sneaks up on you when you are least expecting it. Ladies, there is no way of telling when the next mood swing, or hot flash or other symptom is coming. Some days it happens two at a time and well if it were so the hubby would have days marked on the calendar. A big plus for this book is- set down for this one ladies this book was actually written by a woman, imagine that?

I found a book that is not written by a man trying to decipher some Code of Menopausal Women telling us how we should act, feel or look. That amazed me and my curiosity of course

Maybe It's Just My Hormones...

Maybe it is my hormones and then maybe it is just all of the reminders all around me about this wonderful period in my life but how many of you menopausal ladies can relate to this little beauty...

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=za1ya3oBBMg


Shout out to all the wrinkled ladies!

video from Youtube

Welcome To The Wonderful World Of Menopause Years

Welcome to the Wonderful World of Menopause. If you've just stumbled in the door, then I guess we should start with the intro. I blog under the name Gossip_GrL. I am a baby boomer. I just turned the half-century mark in 2013.

Menopause started for me at age 42 in the form of what they call perimenopause. If you are in your perimenopausal years isn't that just a barrel of laughs? Mother Nature sure knows how to throw a party, doesn't she?

I went into menopause two years ago, meaning I don't get that little monthly reminder and best of all no cramps and PMS to deal with anymore. Now I do have periods of hormonal outbursts which are related to this time in life, but I wouldn't trade it for all the cramps in the world. Oh No!

I have decided to start this blog in order to post topics, venting, and rantings related to menopause as I see it. I think my other blog is running out of room for the Menopausal postings anyway.

Don't me wrong, my other blog has a great group of followers and from it's beginning I have blogged on various topics, but I sometimes think the guy readers and younger readers who aren't ready for anything related to this wonderful time of life get tired of reading about this subject over there, ya know?

This blog isn't just for the menopausal ladies either. Men are more than welcome to read and join in on the conversations by commenting on the postings and they do!

I think it is great that men are interested in reading anything related to menopause. Whenever I have posted on the subject on my other blog are several male readers who engage in the comment.
I guess I should also warn you that my postings tend to be on the lighter, more funnier side of this wonderful time in my life. I figure I can either turn into one of those grumpy old ladies or I can just laugh with it.

I've decided to laugh my butt off all the way. If you by chance have followed from my other blog, then pull up a chair and let's get this party started!

© 2014 Gossip_GrL

This site is registered with:

My Free Copyright