Inside The Menopausal Mind

This is a Maxine pic

This is a repost of the post for an older April A-Z posting I did for the letter I.  I have chosen Inside the Menopausal Mind as my topic today. I noticed about the same time that my AARP card arrived in the mail that many changes take place inside our minds during menopause.

Yep folks! I am an official card carrying member of the AARP and somehow I feel as if I am stuck in the middle. You see, I am too young for all the senior benefits and retirement; yet old enough to know better. It sucks.

In years past I used to shop for purses and shoes; I now shop for Gold Bond Anti Itch cream. I used to love going shopping, now just the thought of it makes me want to take a nap.
Driving is the worst. I used to not care so much how people drove on the roadway, now it's crazy. Those cars that pass on the shoulder thinking they
are getting in front of me oh no... they'll have to just smash the side of my car as I close in the gap.

The realization of all those wants and needs are replaced with the worry about wrinkles, crows feet and the gray hairs that suddenly appear as I sleep. With the slowing metabolism and the days, I feel bloated comes, honey am I fat? Am I still sexy? and Promise you'll still love me?

With each hot flash, I worry if I am just one hot flash away from break down. If that isn't bad enough just when I think it's safe to play on the playground, I worry whether the equipment will break;  hoping and praying we won't be that couple struck down in our prime with low libido. Oh and speaking of hot flashes, I once caught my hubby watching the clock. I said, Honey, they aren't like contractions. You can't time them!

After waking one morning with snow at the foot of the bed because I left the window open the kids call and ask, "What does daddy need for Christmas?" That's easy "Your dad needs an insulated sleeping bag to save him from hypothermia!"

I've noticed with aging, the mouth to brain filter stops working and speaking of that, my kids will call me, "Can I get your honest opinion?" When I tell them.... honestly, they get pissed at me and won't talk to me for weeks. I don't know I just don't get it. I swear this year I am thinking that the switch between Daylight savings time and Standard Time is just a plot against aging folks. Next year I am taking the week off.

Oh and this one is important. If you are a young lady and you are saying, "not tonight honey, I have a headache" Stop doing that immediately! When you get my age you'll be wondering if that headache is a stroke!

Folks we need to get attention to this immediately with a Sally Struthers spokesperson, "For just 70 cents a day, you can save a menopausal lady from the suffering from Dry Itchy Skin, Hot Flashes, Bloating, Confusion, Forgetfulness, Crazy Dreams, Sleep Apnea, Napping, Gassiness, leaking from lack of bladder control, Sagging and wrinkly skin... must be stopped in our lifetime before another one writes a 50 Shades of Menopause trilogy." 

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Pic credit: Maxine

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